Prop 8's Ancestor

TV ads for this shameful bit of legislation presented the proposition as somehow connected to public schools. It gave the impression that teachers were going to have to teach children that gay marriage is OK. Oh yes, and without parental son consent.

In case you were wondering, this is pure bullshit. Read the rest of this entry

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

Witnessing History

In the 21 months since he asked me the question,“Dad, Who will you vote for?” he’s been involved in the political season that culminated last night with Barack Obama’s inspirational win.

Justin accompanied me to our local polling location, waited in line with me for about 30 minutes in the early morning chill, and held my sample ballot while he watched me participate in democracy.

While waiting in line, and in typical 12 year-old fashion, he asked, “How many McCain supporters do you think are here?”

I said there was no way to tell; that people don’t look Republican or Democratic.  They’re all citizens interested in casting their vote for the candidate they hope would bring change to America.

Later in the evening he sat beside me watching election returns.  He also sang a short song he’d composed about Barack Obama winning the election.  That told me that 1) he’s been listening to the political conversation and 2) he’s more likely to be politically engaged in the ensuing years.

That makes me happy.

We sat and listened to both John McCain’s concession speech and President-elect Obama’s acceptance.  I continually wiped tears from my cheeks, moved by the tremendous step forward this country had the courage to take yesterday.

He looked at me and said, “I really am witnessing history, aren’t I Dad?”

I hugged him and softly whispered, “Yes, son. You are.”

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

Obama, Baby!

OK, I admit it, I’ve been rabid about the candidacy of Barack Obama.  Not because he’s the Messiah, but because (partly) the alternatives are so incredibly horrible.

Add the endorsement last Sunday of Gen. Colin Powell - a thinking Republican - and that of Michael Smerconish -a conservative Republican radio talk show host- and you can see why I’m bullish on this.

If I were to really lay off all election stuff, I’d not mention the incredibly racist comments of Comedian Rush Limbaugh over the weekend, Rep. Bachman’s (R-Mn) call for McCarthyesque “anti-American” test for all members of congress or how the state of Maine’s US Sentators asked McCain to stop the robocalling in their state.

Having said that, it feels like it’s time to move on to othe topics of interest.  Topics like…oh, let’s see….parenting, dating, kids, simplicity, productivity…you know…all those things I say in the little blurb to the right.

Rush Limbaugh is a big fat idiot.

OK, sorry.  That was absolutely last election-related, Tourette-like outburst.  Promise.

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

Monday - At work with a full blown pre-winter cold.  It’s the first one I’ve had in over a year.  Luckily, as I write this early Sunday morning, it only lasted the week.  I was able to beg off business travel for the week which would have taken me back to SLC on Friday.  Having a cold on top of a day trip (which always wipes me out) would have been too much.  I heard a bit of blow-back about it, but who cares.  I’ve been out sick 0 days in the past year. I worked all week anyway because of deadlines.

Tuesday - More sniffling and medicine head due to not getting to the pharmacy in time to buy the real Sudafed.  Instead, had to settle for the OTC-non-methamphetamine-precursor; the kind you can buy without showing your ID to the pharmacist.  It doesn’t work.  Finally got some real stuff and felt loads better.

Wednesday / Thursday - Not much different.  I picked up my new glasses - a slight change in prescription and major change in frames.  I haven’t got a picture made in these new frames yet, but think ‘Kieth Olberman.’  Justin, my 12-year-old-liberal-in-training, keeps calling me Kieth. :)  Began getting ready to attend a birthday BBQ for my son-in-law at his parent’s home in San Leandro in the East Bay (think south of Oakland) by phoning Bethany for gift ideas.  She gave me some good suggestions, but in the end, I went with my gut on this one - a book I saw at Borders in the Capitola Mall - ‘1001 Ways To Be Romantic!‘  Hey, I may not know a whole lot about successful marriages, but I do know how important romance can be in a new relationship (any stage of a relationship, actually).  I inscribed the following inside:

“David -

A little bit of romance makes up for a whole lot of dirty dishes.

Barry”

Friday - Made travel arrangements for my month end week in Salt Lake City (SLC).  Got a couple of non-stops to and from SLC so I can avoid the roller-coaster approach into Reno/Tahoe.  When I fly Southwest Airlines I’m usually routed SLC to Reno/Tahoe to San Jose.  I’ve never had any turbulence flying into San Jose.  I lose my nearly lose my lunch flying into Reno.  So this time I got lucky. Justin spent the night with his mom and I drove around deciding whether or not to see Oliver Stone’s new film, W.  Opted not to, mainly because a little voice inside told me to go home.  I’ve learned over the years to listen to this little alter-ego and I went home.   I went to bed at 9 -aided by a Trazedone - a script my family physician gave me to take when I haven’t slept well the week before- and slept pretty well. A bit of a hangover the following morning from the Trazedone, but it was Saturday and some strong Italian Roast took care of it.

Saturday - Picked up Justin and we drove to San Leandro for David’s BBQ.  In the past (for at least 15 years), whenever I’ve gathered at a ‘family’ function where my ex-wife and her side of the family have hosted the event, I’ve always felt out of place.  Kind of like a Liberal Democrat at a fundraiser for Conservative Republicans. There are reasons for this that extend outside (and may not have anything to do with) politics. Personal issues on both sides are at the core most likely, but I’ve tried over the years to just be myself and let the chips fall where they may.  I have to say that Bethany and David’s wedding was not only a turning point in my own life, but perhaps it has something to do with the increased ease that all demonstrate when I’m in the crowd. Or it could be that I’m way too obsessed with how other perceive me. You think?

Whatever…all I know is that it was good to see my daughter and new son-in-law, Ben, Crystal and Justin loves seeing them at any time.  Wanda and Joel -David’s parents- were terrific hosts and went to a lot of trouble the day a happy one for David.  I enjoyed being in their home.

Forecast for this this week…Ok, let me look into my crystal ball….channeling Carnac….ok, it’s clear now…just what I thought…..can’t see a thing.

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

As I sat in the dental hygienist’s chair and tried to answer questions with my entire mouth anesthetized (offered verbal gibberish in staccato fashion), I was moved to near tears when she said:

“As a single parent, you’re really ‘on-24-7,’ aren’t you?  It must take its toll on you.”

The tears that blurred my vision were immediate. She may have thought they were due to the sharp, pointy scalars she was employing to remove some subgingival calculi, but I knew where they originated. They came from the deepest center of my being - the one that’s securely guarded by layers of emotional Kevlar.

In the five years since I became a single-parent with full custody of my now 12-year old son, the number of people who really get what it means to be in this position have been few. I think it was the sudden recognition of this spot-on understanding that allowed me to let down my guard and simply feel that it’s OK to acknowledge that it’s a tough journey.

Part of this journey is balancing the demands of my job with the responsibilities at home. It’s a common issue faced by all single parents who must work to support their children and still be an effective parent.

In my job, I travel about two to three times per month for a couple of days at a time. Limited travel can work in my situation, but anything more that a three times a month is a hardship for both me and him.

I have minimal local support.  I’m a good 40 miles from my nearest adult child and all three of them are busy leading their own lives. I’ve made few friends in the past five years, most of which is a function of my self-preservation modus operandi I fall into.

I’ve been burned too many times in relationships and, as a result, allow only a few into the inner sanctum of my life.  Protecting my son is paramount; and it often regulates my own social interactions. Add to that my introverted nature and I can very easily become insulated and hermit-like.

But a hermit, I don’t want to be.  It’s not healthy for me or for him. And so I’m getting comfortable with the idea of venturing out of my comfort-zone and into the unknown.

Anyone have a map?

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

I Can Dream. :)

I would love for my home to look like this. This speaks to me of freedom and unrestrained positive energy.  It’s great Feng Shui.

Of course the rigid nature of the furniture doesn’t speak to much comfort in sitting or reclining, but the calmness and energy balance is overpowering.

I’ve always been drawn to the simple organization and style of a zen-like room.  Here’s a photo from Tim Ferriss’ blog that depicts his home office.  You gotta  love it.

Tim Ferriss' Home Office

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

No, I’m not talking about my daughter’s wedding.  Although it remains a highlight in my collection of life experiences.

The two loves

(OK, fetishes is probably the more operative word here) of my life -apart from my children and my parents- are Starbucks Coffee and pens.

Not just any pens, but fine writing instruments.  I paid homage to my 20-year old Mont Blanc recently in a post about the role possessons lay in my life. (You can read it here if you’re new to these pages.)

Now for the big news!

It's not a Mont Blanc, but it is from SB!

Fellow office-supply lover and very clever blogger Cinderberry (on StationeryFetish.com) confirms this mega-news in her post here.

Just scroll down in the comments and you’ll see the evidence.

Even though I’m in Salt Lake City today for a meeting, I’m keeping my Starbucks Radar on full power in case I drive by (rare in SLC) a retail location with these wonderful new products.

And if you’re out and about and you come across said SB planner and pen, snap a photo and send it my way, would ya?

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

The Overweight Perp Walk

OK, it’s not really me, but the graphic illustrates the state in which I presently find myself.

I’m the guy in the middle…in the middle of life, in the middle of parenting Justin…and yes, I’m a middle child.

The point is I need to make some changes in my life, in my health, in my parenting strategy.

And I know first hand that change isn’t easy.

Here’s what’s going on in most areas of my life (some things have to remain private, you know?).

I was sitting in the dentist’s chair before a procedure and the dental assistant took my blood pressure.  160/106.

YIKES!

For those without a clinical background, textbook perfect blood pressure is typically 120/80.  The bottom number (diastolic pressure) is the one that’s most important as it measures the pressure within the arteries when the heart is in its relaxation phase of pumping.

Read the rest of this entry

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

Got Change?

One the right of the political spectrum you have the conservative Republican party led by nominee Senator John McCain of Arizona. He’s endorsed by such GOP stars as George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and that moose-hunter from Wasilla.

On the left, there is Senator Barack Obama of Illinois and Senator Joe Biden of Connecticut. They’re supported by Hillary Clinton, President Bill Clinton, President Jimmy Carter, Nancy Pelosi and the rest of the Democratic party.

I believe you ought be able to articulate why you support a certain candidate. In that regard, here are my reasons for supporting Barack Obama for President. Read the rest of this entry

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!

Sunday Morning Worship

Monday being Labor Day -a legal holiday- and as such, a Monday I don’t have to report to work, I’m doing what I usually do on Sunday mornings: Sit in bed, drink good coffee and write. It’s my Sunday routine, you might say.

For some, Sunday involves being in bed reading the San Francisco Chronicle, the New York Times or the LA Times (3 of the best newspapers in the world).  For others, it’s the morning preamble to worship and church attendance. Read the rest of this entry

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to Email updates!!